I have a new Boss...

[13:54] Me: plzzzzzzzzzzzzzz gimme one chance....
[13:54] She: nahi never
13:55] She: do u promise to do all my work?
[13:55] Me: ok i'll try my best
[13:56] Me: now can u be my boss???
[13:56] She: and ur salary will be Rs.100 per month
[13:56] Me: no i want 110
[13:56] She: nahi no way
[13:56] Me: plzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
[13:56] She: 100 else ure not hired
[13:57] Me: ok ok...105..this will be fine naa...
[13:57] She: 10Rs increment after 1 yr
[13:57] Me: i want 105....else..
[13:57] She: nahi i cant decid tht...hr will...but i say NO
[13:57] She: thik hai 105
[13:58] Me: ok boss...when can i go onsite???
[13:58] She: after 10 yrs
[13:59] Me: 10 yrs???
[13:59] She: haan
[13:59] Me: what if i show remarkable performance..can i go earlier than that then???
[14:00] She: maybe in 9 and a half yrs
[14:00] She: no less than tht
[14:00] Me: nahin i wanna go in 9 yrs...
[14:00] She: noooooooooooooooooooooo
[14:00] Me: u see i cant waste time...
[14:00] She: i cant compromise on everything
[14:00] Me: u want me to wait 6 months more..
[14:00] She: as it is i'm giving u too much sal
[14:00] Me: 9 yrs is ok...lekin 9 yrs 6 months..
[14:01] Me: outrageous[14:01]
[14:01] She: nahi 9 yrs 6 months
[14:01] She: join if u want
[14:01] She: else go
[14:01] Me: ok ok..cool down boss
[14:01] She: ;-)
[14:01] Me: y do u talk abt going :-(
[14:02] She: hmmm
[14:03] Me: ok, how many leave's can i take in a year???
[14:03] She: 2
[14:03] Me: ....say the number after 2
[14:04] She: 2 leaves per yr
[14:04] She: thts all
[14:04] Me: only 2???
[14:04] She: n u have to work on saturdays also
14:04] Me: aiela
[14:04] She: half day
[14:04] She: on sat 10am - 2pm
[14:04] Me: is this a school???
[14:05] She: weekdays - 9am - 9pm
14:05] Me: btw... on which platform i will work on??
[14:05] Me: ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
[14:05] She: 1 hr lunch Brk
[14:05] Me: 9 to 9
[14:05] Me: :O
[14:05] She: haan
[14:06] She: u'll work on batch processing systems...we dont have enough funding for computers
[14:06] Me: hmmm.. if i finish my work early sometime, can i take u out for dinner???
[14:06] She: in ur 105Rs salary?
[14:06] She: i dont think so
[14:07] She: road pe khaayenge kya??
[14:07] Me: wont i get a 'dating' allowance???
[14:07] She: if u perform well for 5 yrs, u'll get an extra allowance of Rs.50 per month
[14:07] Me: hmmm.....
[14:08] Me: btw what were u saying abt the work.. and platform...
[14:08] She: batch processing systems
[14:08] She: no modern computers
[14:09] Me: hey..
[14:09] Me: i have experience only in one platform...
[14:09] She: ?
[14:09] She: which one?
[14:10] Me: Railway
[14:10] She: haan tho coolie ka kaam de doo??
[14:11] Me: :-(
[14:11] Me: i had got a promotion 2 yrs back from that post
[14:11] She: acchhaaaaaaaa
[14:11] Me: yaa...
[14:11] She: abhi kya karte ho?
[14:11] Me: its a very loooong story....
[14:11] Me: abhi...i outsource that
[14:12] She: hmmm
[14:12] Me: so i started getting along in comp's
[14:12] She: dekh dont waste my time...do u want the job or not?
[14:12] Me: lemme tell u my strengths
[14:13] Me: suno na suno naa sun loo naa..( i can sing too )
[14:14] She: ok can u operate batch proc systems?
[14:14] Me: i dunno what that is.. but i can learn...i am a very fast learner..
[14:14] Me: i learnt sending mails in only 2 months...
[14:14] Me: amd i have successfully sent 100 mails so far
[14:15] She: hmmm
[14:15] Me: now temme what do u think?? can i go onsite after 9 yrs???
[14:15] She: so now i know u wil be wastin lot of my company's bandwidth
[14:15] She: with ur emails
[14:15] She: :X
[14:15] Me: noo...
[14:16] Me: i will use the net only from the govt library, where net is free for all
[14:16] Me: i go there everyday
[14:16] She: haan thik hai...but stil 9.5yrs no reduction in tht
[14:16] Me: and u know that librarian likes me a lot...she's a huge fan of me...
[14:17] She: why r u tellin me these stories?
[14:17] Me: she takes my autograph everyday before i leave.. have u ever met sucha a fan before???
[14:17] She: yaar kahaniyaan mat suna
14:17] Me: to show that i have good inter personal skills also
[14:17] She: i only need u to operate batch systems...no interaction with other ppl
[14:18] Me: hmmm....
[14:18] Me: ok madam... is there anything else that i need to know???
[14:18] She: when can u join us?
[14:19] Me: Hmmmmmm.....When i come there.
[14:19] She: u'll have to join on that day itself
[14:19] She: no delays
[14:20] Me: ok..i'll join u on the railway station itself
[14:20] She: no come down to our office
[14:20] Me: hmmm...
[14:20] Me: do i need to start workin on that day itself??
[14:21] She: yes..u'll have a 1hr training
[14:21] Me: madam ji...ther is a small problem
[14:21] Me: i have a frnd, and i need to meet her on that day itself..
[14:22] She: u can meet after 9pm
[14:22] Me: after 9 PM...she would mind probably...
[14:22] Me: i hope u understand
14:22] She: ok i'll let u go at 8pm
[14:22] Me: i will work overtime and make up for the lost hrs of work
[14:23] She: haan thik hai
[14:23] She: 8pm
[14:23] Me: and i will have my lunch break for 3 hrs...
[14:23] She: no way..our gates r locked everyday til 9pm
[14:23] She: u cant go out
14:23] Me: i'll jump out..
[14:23] Me: thats another of my speciality
[14:23] She: nah...we have electocuted walls...
[14:24] Me: i will drink red bull, it'll gimme wings and i'll fly out
[14:24] She: X(
[14:24] She: i wont hire u
[14:24] She: ure rejected
[14:24] Me: :-(
[14:25] Me: ok madam ji.. i'll work
[14:25] Me: i wont run away or fly away
14:25] Me: plzzz i need this job very badly
[14:25] Me: dont reject me
[14:25] She: haan thik hai
[14:25] She: fine
[14:25] She: come to my office...

The text above has been duly edited and abridged, of course, with prior permission from my Boss( well, almost)... ;-)